We had dad’s funeral yesterday and it was a joyous but also a sad, upsetting and long hard day. We wanted it to be fun as that was what dad was like he always made me laugh and the rest of the family and his friends, he was such a kind and gentle man with a heart of pure gold. Even as I write this post I can’t believe he has gone and I will never get to see him again, Sarah, Novi, Richard, Colin and I went to his grave this morning to take a couple of flowers from his wreath so we could press them and preserve them. we also sprinkled some wild flowers over his plot as well, they should hopefully start to come up this year although it may be to late but they will come up next year.
Colin took a photo of Sarah Novi and I at the grave side which I think is ok to put on this post, I don’t think it is a morbid thing to do, where dad is, is in a place of natural beauty and I don’t see it as a generic grave yard as there are no head stones and no imposing church, we are basically in a wild flower meadow.
I think dad would of liked the service he had some of the music he enjoyed listening to and his friends and family including cousins I have never seen before where there to see him off and to pay their respects. I wrote the eulogy from Sarah and myself which Stephen (The celebrant) read out and it came across really well which I was very pleased about I will add it to the bottom of this post. He also read out pieces from Rosie Mac (his Sister) where she told everyone what a horrid sister she was! and that he still loved her and her him as well which was very touching its not very often that Rosie gets emotional but she did then.
We had the wake at Sarah’s and most of the people went, that part was fun for everyone and it was nice to get to know dad’s cousins, Shaun, Paddy and Michelle as well as seeing my cousin Alister who I have not seen since 2000.
below is the eulogy I wrote for dad on behalf of Sarah and myself
We have so many fond memories of dad; we would love to tell them all but you might get a tad bored.
Dad was a very kind, caring, funny man who loved music, he could play the Drums, Guitar and Harmonica – some may say not very well but we enjoyed listening to him, we have great memories of us all playing together in the front room of our home in Earlswood; Sarah on the recorder, Mum and James on the Piano and dad on the Guitar I think we liked to see ourselves as the next Von-Trap’s – Sarah and James
Dad being so kind and caring to everything that crossed his path in life, he particularly loved animals and nature. Now, Dad being a big 6’3” trucker thundering down the small country lanes in his 19 ton tipper lorry (you would of assumed that he would be big and butch – how wrong you would be) he was traveling down the lane when he saw this little baby bunny on the side of the grass verge, so he stopped his truck which held up all the other road users but he didn’t care he just wanted to rescue this poor defenseless animal. He scooped up the little bunny with his shovel-sized hands and put him in his lunch box to protect him, he came back home and tried to nurse it back to health. However, nature can be cruel and unfortunately the little bunny rabbit died during the night. Sarah went to dad and asked him how the bunny was doing to which he turned round and picked up the rabbit by one foot and said in a very serious voice with somber look “It’s stiff!” Sarah couldn’t help but roar with laughter while at the same time dad had a tear in his eye. – Sarah
We really enjoyed going out for day trips in dads lorry, we got excited that we had to wake up at 4am to get to his work by 5 but within 20 minutes of us being in his lorry we used to be asleep on the bunk bed! He was a very generous man – some will say too generous and he used to buy us lots of food from the snack vans dotted around the run he made delivering sand or top soil. He used to let us drive the truck a little bit as well in the yard (I’m not sure health and safety would of liked that though!) – Sarah and James
Travelling back to 1983, Mum, Dad, Sarah, James, and dear family friends Carol, Peter & Andy, and our grandparents went to Italy for a camping holiday, I don’t remember too much about the holiday as I was only 3 at the time but I was told by dad on numerous occasions that once I got lost and Mum, Dad and everyone else was searching for me – they obviously wasn’t searching to far away from the alcohol because they didn’t find me, instead these two topless sunbathers found me and brought me back. Dad told me that he wasn’t sure weather to thank the ladies for bringing me back or to thank me for bringing the ladies back! – James
As we have said above Dad loved music and he could play several musical instruments he played drums in a band back in the 90’s, we used to always go to them and watch him play, we always felt very proud of him when he was playing, I’m not sure our mother liked it when he used to practice in the house!
These are just a very small selection of memories we have, we are going to miss dad more than words can say and his passing has left a great big hole in our lives that nothing will ever be able to fill. Sleep tight dad.